My unexpected trip to Montana for my grandmother’s funeral was bittersweet. When I found out she had passed, I was upset that I wouldn’t get to see her one last time. But, Alzheimer’s has a nasty way of taking away the person you love before their actual death. I’m so thankful I was able to make it back to Montana for her funeral.
One of my first jobs in Interior Design was working on retirement, nursing and assisted living homes that had Alzheimer units. After seeing the varying degrees and the resident’s personalities, we were happy to say that although she lost her memories, she kept her cheerful, silly disposition. It gave us a glimpse that she was still there somehow.
What I love about each of my grandmothers’ deaths is how all of the aunts and uncles reconnected and share stories that I had never heard or had long since forgotten. It was so nice to have everyone together. As we said goodbye to my grandmother and to each other, I wondered when the next time we would all be together.
What things bring your extended family back together?
It was good that you were able to got to your Grandmother’s funeral. As my family becomes smaller and smaller, we haven’t gotten together for the last two losses of family members. I think that the funeral ritual helps those left behind accept and cope so I hate to see the ritual disappear in my family. Because most of the family spends the winter in Florida and then returns to the Midwest in the spring, cremation has become standard in someone dies in Florida. I’m like you, I liked it when all the older generation got together and told stories at wakes and funerals.
It really is one of the best things about funerals…remembering the person gone and connecting with family you haven’t seen in a long time! It’s too bad that your family isn’t continuing on with that tradition. I’m sure when everyone is spread out, it can be difficult expense-wise.